I’ve always loved reading other mothers’ birth stories, and knew no matter how my experience turned out I wanted to share it. I tried to give as many details as possible, so this is a long post…

I should start out by saying, I was absolutely terrified at the thought of labor. When I was 6 months pregnant we went to the hospital for a baby CPR class and after the class we took a tour of the hospital. That’s when it clicked – this baby had to come out of my body and there are only 2 options for how that can happen. The unknown of how this would happen was terrifying to me. I subscribe to the thought process on all things medical that ignorance is bliss and the more I knew about labor, the more it terrified me. I would be standing in a crowded place and think to myself all of these people are here because of women who gave birth to them, so it can’t be that bad, right?

No matter how many women told me once you get the epidural it’s smooth sailing, I still couldn’t fully process not knowing how delivery would go. People would often tell me their labor stories both good and bad. When I heard the good, I thought that would never happen to me and when I heard the bad I couldn’t get the scenario out of my head. Kevin put it into perspective for me when he said “We get to have our own story of how our baby will be born. Let’s not be hyper-focused on other people’s experiences and let whatever happens to us happen. We get to have our own birth story to tell.” He was right. Once I adopted that mindset and knew I would be in great care at the hospital I wasn’t as nervous anymore.

Week 37

By week 37 I started to feel like every celebrity or friend of a friend who was pregnant with a due date after mine had already had their baby. I started to get antsy. I should mention I am fortunate that I didn’t mind being pregnant, but at this point I was ready to not be pregnant anymore. Kevin and I decided for the sake of our sanity we had to adopt the mindset that we’d go past our January 28th due date and that our baby girl would make her debut in February.

Week 38

At the 38 week appointment my doctor told me if we made it to our next appointment she could strip my membranes which could potentially jump start labor.  She said it tends to be most effective for women who’ve already given birth, but I had a 50/50 chance it would work. Having your membranes stripped means your doctor puts their finger into your cervix and gently separate the bag of water from the side of the uterus near the cervix.

I spent most of week 38 walking, eating pineapple, drinking raspberry leaf tea and trying any and every old wives tale to induce labor and still no baby…

Week 39

Kevin and I decided we wanted to have my membranes stripped. My doctor reminded us we had a 50/50 chance it would work and if it did it would be within 24 hours. Having my membranes stripped was painless, so much that I asked my doctor if she was sure she had done it correctly. She assured me she had.

24 hours passed and I didn’t have any feelings that labor was imminent. Ugh! On the morning of January 24th, I had a client meeting and I decided I wanted to see a movie by myself that afternoon. Seeing a movie solo is something I’ve always wanted to do and I knew once baby c made her debut that wouldn’t be an option.

I purchased my ticket and texted Kevin to let him know I was fulfilling a bucket list item and that I’d be unreachable for the next 2 hours.

I got cozy in my seat with snacks in hand and 15 minutes into starting the movie, They Call Me By My Name, I felt like I needed to use the restroom. Which is common for any 9 month pregnant women. After going to the bathroom, I felt like things kept flowing…not at an urgent pace, but it felt like a slow trickle was happening that I couldn’t control. It didn’t feel like my water had broke. It wasn’t like how Charlotte’s water breaks when she runs into Mr. Big at lunch. This isn’t happening, right? I talked myself out of it and decided to waddle back to my seat, so I could catch up on my movie. Remember I was fulfilling a bucket list item and this luxury would be hard to come by post baby. Approximately 2 minutes later I decided my water had indeed been broken and I needed to get out of there ASAP. {Side note: my brother told me this story would be way better if I was seeing the movie, The Shape of Water.}

I left the theater immediately to call Kevin and of course he didn’t answer. I feverishly texted him “I think my water broke. Call me.” He called me right away. In a state of panic I told him I didn’t know what to do and he assured me that I knew exactly what to do…call the doctor and he’d hop in a cab to meet me at home.

When I explained to my doctor what was happening she said it definitely sounded like my water had broke and the stripping of my membranes had worked! She said that I had 2 hours to get to the hospital and I should eat something since once I’d be admitted I wouldn’t be able to eat.

Of course this was the only day in the past 2 weeks that I had opted not to shower. I was getting ready every morning as if it could be the day I went into labor. I quickly hopped into the shower and Kevin threw a frozen pizza in the oven. We assembled our bags and got ready to go to the hospital to meet our baby. Was this really happening? We didn’t even know what to talk about as we were chowing down on our pizza.

Triage

The drive to the hospital I weirdly calm and when we arrived to the hospital Kevin was more nervous than I was. At 2:45pm we checked into triage and waited 15 minutes before being brought in. This isn’t at all how I had expected labor to begin. Where was the chaos and screaming?

After confirmation that my water had broke it was pretty clear by my calm demeanor that I wasn’t having any contractions. I was told I’d be given Pitocin to induce labor. While waiting in our triage room to be transferred into labor and delivery we turned on the tv and started watching Storage Wars. Again, this isn’t how I anticipated labor happening. We had time to watch an episode of Storage Wars.

I was told that since this was my first baby and I wasn’t having contractions this could take 24 hours. Once your water breaks you’re at a higher risk for infection, so they don’t want to check yet to see how many cm I was dilated. All we knew was at my 39 week appointment I was 1 cm dilated, which means nothing.

It’s happening!

We we’re wheeled up to labor and delivery at 6pm and were introduced to a slew of people who explained their individual roles in our delivery. At our hospital in addition to your nurse you are given a midwife or a resident. We were assigned a midwife.  At this point, things still didn’t feel quite real to me.

A nurse came into our room and said the hospital was doing a study to see if there’s an impact on labor when you start with a low amount of Pitocin vs double the dosage. Eventually you work your way up to that doubled amount, but this would potentially mean if I got the double dosage right off the bat my labor would progress quicker. The dosage measurement was done blindly, so the only person that knew what was given to me was the pharmacist. We decided to give it a go if it meant labor could be faster.

We’re pretty positive I was given the higher dosage because 20 minutes later I really wanted that epidural. The contractions started to kick in and I just wasn’t comfortable in any position.

The epidural is a sterile procedure and I wasn’t thrilled Kevin had to leave the room, but the anesthesiologist and midwife were there to help me. The insertion of the epidural wasn’t painful at all. From the point that I asked for the epidural to receiving it is now a blur, but I know once the epidural kicked in I was totally fine.

Our midwife ordered me to labor down and let the Pitocin continue to work. Laboring down just means resting and letting all of those things work together to get labor moving along. Kevin and I attempted to get some rest, which was easier said than done.

After an hour and half the midwife did an exam and said “You’re complete.” To us, we thought she meant my water was fully broken. While in triage, we were told some women’s water doesn’t fully break. I responded “Meaning, my water fully broke?” and she said “Meaning you’re fully dilated. Let’s try a few practice pushes.” WHAT? It’s go time? That happened much faster than I anticipated. We did a few practice pushes and she said she was going to call my doctor to let her know my progress.

She came back asked if we wanted our daughter’s birthday to be January 24th or 25th? We agreed we’d love if she’d make her debut tonight. She said “OK, you need to be 100% sure because once you start pushing you can’t stop.”

Between Kevin, our midwife and the nurses I felt like I had a full cheerleading team. I was in a great mood. In-between pushes we learned a lot about our midwife and nurses…where they lived, how many kids they had, how long they’d been in labor & delivery. The epidural was working wonders and I couldn’t feel anything all while still being able to push. Eventually, it dawned on me that my doctor wasn’t there…turns out the doctor isn’t in the room until those last few pushes which was news to me. I really don’t remember those final pushes because I didn’t think they were my final ones. After 45 minutes of pushing, Caroline Elizabeth Cassman was born at 10:47pm weighing 5lbs 14oz and 18.5 inches long.